Peace is not the absence of problems, it is the presence of God. I can honestly tell you that I have more peace in my life today than I have ever had before. That does not mean that I have no problems or that I am free from any concerns; it simply means I am coming to know how to trust God. Trusting God in His sovereignty and trusting God that He is always looking for my best interest are two things that are becoming reality to me in my every day life. Thank YOU, Lord, for bringing me to places I never knew.
Primarily, I believe there are 3 robbers of our peace.
1. Pressures (deadlines, bills to pay, peer, etc)
2. Problems (sickness, loss of job, etc)
3. People (abuse, prodigal child, criticism, etc)
Just as sin robs you of your joy, worry robs you of your peace. For every second you spend in worry, you are robbing yourself of God's peace. When you TRULY give God your worries, He gives you His peace. The key word here is truly. We can say we do this and so many times, we allow ourselves to recapture that worry and take it back. I know all too well this to be true because so many times I do it myself.
Ways to go about having peace are found in Philippians, chapter 4.
Specifically, verse 3, Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!
I know some people will say that it is easy for me to say that as I am not the one facing _____, fill in the blank. That is absolutely correct, I am not. BUT, I am not the one who says this; Paul is! Remember Paul is not free in the world here; he is in a dungeon prison, chained to a Roman soldier 24 hours a day living on bread and water, and nasty water at that, thinking every single day is his last day. He is facing a horrible death at any time and he knows this and is living with this while what? REJOICING, yes, rejoicing. I do not believe for one second this was an easy thing to do for Paul. I know it is hard to rejoice when we are facing cancer, job loss, abuse, a prodigal child....yet, Paul emphasizes the fact that we should rejoice.
I am also not implicating that we should rejoice that we have lost our job or that we are facing cancer or whatever your problem may be; I am saying that we are to rejoice IN THE LORD. He is always good even when our circumstances are not. You can always rejoice in the greatness of God, in the grace of the Lord.
Philippians 4:5 Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near.
Relax. I take this meaning of near to be next to as in space, not near as in time. So to know that our Creator is always near us is more comfort than any words or instruction from any person. When others see you calm in the middle of a storm, they want to know why and how you can possibly be this way: Jesus near.
Philippians 4:6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
I have found that it is hard for me to worry when I am thanking God and praying. Every time we are confronted with a problem, a dilemma, I think it is an invitation to take it to God in prayer and for Him to grow us. It is certainly easy to thank Him in the good times but what I am going after here is that we don't necessarily thank God when things are good, we thank God because HE is good. I want to be the person who can look into the face of God and thank Him for bringing these problematic things to me, knowing I have been given the ability in Him to release them to Him because He cares for me and He has my best interest at heart. The closer I have become to the Father, the deeper and more intimate my prayer life has become. It is a time of refuge and of sweet consolation for me to be in fervent prayer. When I pray, I find it hard to worry. My cares are placed at the foot of the Cross and I am able to walk away KNOWING that I KNOW that He cares. This would be considered release. Release it to HIM.
Philippians 4:7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
This is the rest that God gives us IN HIM. This is peace. Like I said before, peace is not the absence of problems, it is the presence of God.
I pray that God's peace be with each one of you today and that you seek HIM in new and deeper ways. I pray that each one who reads this will have all doubt removed that God is good. Believe me, I have problems but I have a much bigger God than any problems I could ever face. Thank YOU, Lord, that YOU are able to handle them all and that YOU will work all things to the good for those of us who believe. May you all believe in HIS goodness today. In Jesus Holy Name....
Friday, January 28, 2011
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Setting Your Captives Free: Forgiveness
Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. ~Ephesians 4:32~
Forgiveness is the gift we all want to receive but so often we find it hard to give. It is not easy to forgive. Yet, I believe in forgiveness is revival and freedom. When we repent, God mercifully forgives us and releases us from our debt. He did this through the high price of His Son's death on a wooden cross. We are called to forgive others because we received His forgiveness. When we are able to release our offenders, we find the key to unlock the door of our own hearts and that sets us free to experience peace and joy.
We have all been and we will all be hurt or offended at some point in life. The Word doesn't say you MIGHT suffer, it says WHEN you suffer. So, in saying that, we will never totally avoid being hurt or wronged by others. Therefore, we cannot avoid the need to forgive others. If you ask: how many times should I forgive? Matthew 18:22 says seventy times seven. We must be willing to forgive the same person time and time again. Forgiveness unlimited.
I do not believe that forgiveness equals trust, by the way. I think this is an important step in learning the forgiveness process. Forgiving someone does not mean we are to run back and ask for more. It does not mean we forget and allow the same things to happen to us time and again. Trust is a another subject (maybe a future topic?).
I think about the story of Joseph. He was a classic example of being wronged, and by his own family, of all things. Aren't we supposed to be able to rely on family? Well, that is not necessarily the case. We all know someone or it might be you personally, who has had a horrible family life. If this is you, I am so sorry. Back to Joseph, he did not look to someone to blame nor did he seek revenge. Joseph knew God was in control of his life all along and was able to see the hand of God in times of adversity as well as prosperity. He realized that the purposess of God were much greater than his personal comfort. I KNOW that suffering is not comfortable. But, like Joseph, I want to able to forgive and bless those who have mistreated me. I cannot do this on my own; it is only through the strength of Christ in me. The Word is very clear that we are forgiven AS we forgive others. I know all the wrongs in my own life and I want to receive the forgiveness God extends.
Letting the offender off YOUR hook does not mean they are off of God's hook. Forgiveness involves transferring the prisoner over to the ONE who is able and responsible for carrying out justice. It relieves us of the burden and responsibility to hold them in prison ourselves. That is freedom. Just a little something to think about: would I be willing for God to deal with me in the same way that I want to see my offender dealt with?
Be assured that if you are willing to walk into the pain, God will go there with you. Hard as it may be to forgive those who have sinned against you, you will experience great freedom as you choose to obey God, by His grace. In obedience to Him is great joy!!!
Forgiveness is the gift we all want to receive but so often we find it hard to give. It is not easy to forgive. Yet, I believe in forgiveness is revival and freedom. When we repent, God mercifully forgives us and releases us from our debt. He did this through the high price of His Son's death on a wooden cross. We are called to forgive others because we received His forgiveness. When we are able to release our offenders, we find the key to unlock the door of our own hearts and that sets us free to experience peace and joy.
We have all been and we will all be hurt or offended at some point in life. The Word doesn't say you MIGHT suffer, it says WHEN you suffer. So, in saying that, we will never totally avoid being hurt or wronged by others. Therefore, we cannot avoid the need to forgive others. If you ask: how many times should I forgive? Matthew 18:22 says seventy times seven. We must be willing to forgive the same person time and time again. Forgiveness unlimited.
I do not believe that forgiveness equals trust, by the way. I think this is an important step in learning the forgiveness process. Forgiving someone does not mean we are to run back and ask for more. It does not mean we forget and allow the same things to happen to us time and again. Trust is a another subject (maybe a future topic?).
I think about the story of Joseph. He was a classic example of being wronged, and by his own family, of all things. Aren't we supposed to be able to rely on family? Well, that is not necessarily the case. We all know someone or it might be you personally, who has had a horrible family life. If this is you, I am so sorry. Back to Joseph, he did not look to someone to blame nor did he seek revenge. Joseph knew God was in control of his life all along and was able to see the hand of God in times of adversity as well as prosperity. He realized that the purposess of God were much greater than his personal comfort. I KNOW that suffering is not comfortable. But, like Joseph, I want to able to forgive and bless those who have mistreated me. I cannot do this on my own; it is only through the strength of Christ in me. The Word is very clear that we are forgiven AS we forgive others. I know all the wrongs in my own life and I want to receive the forgiveness God extends.
Letting the offender off YOUR hook does not mean they are off of God's hook. Forgiveness involves transferring the prisoner over to the ONE who is able and responsible for carrying out justice. It relieves us of the burden and responsibility to hold them in prison ourselves. That is freedom. Just a little something to think about: would I be willing for God to deal with me in the same way that I want to see my offender dealt with?
Be assured that if you are willing to walk into the pain, God will go there with you. Hard as it may be to forgive those who have sinned against you, you will experience great freedom as you choose to obey God, by His grace. In obedience to Him is great joy!!!
Friday, January 21, 2011
A Tidbit Into My Ongoing Life Story....
The day was April 11 of 2008 and my friend Michelle and I were at a wedding in Austin, TX. I had been single for about 8 years. The very last thing that was on my mind was meeting a man. Well, that’s exactly what happened. His name was Matt and we met the night of the ceremony and sparks flew immediately. We began talking on the phone because you see he was from Lubbock and I lived in Abilene. Then we began seeing each other on the weekends hence started a long distance relationship over the next year plus.
We talked and had what I thought was communication. We had a great relationship. I was the apple of his eye and I thought he hung the moon. We liked the same things, went the same places, and enjoyed the same foods. I had prayed that the Lord would bring a Godly man into my life and Matt talked the talk. We attended church together in Lubbock on the weekends we were there and here on the weekends we were here. We prayed for one another. He had been a member of his church since birth basically and I was strong in my own faith.
We planned our wedding that would take place in a friend’s beautiful back yard. There would be numerous family and friends attending and this was all just perfect. The yard was worked up so gorgeous and the florist had specific instruction. The cake decorator was perfect with all her drawings and details about what I wanted. The honeymoon to Vegas was a gift from his parents and both his and my parents were so very excited also.
The day came and turned out so perfect. Everything seemed to just fall into place and we were wed on June 6 of 2009. Then, it will be followed by a tragic surge of events. 2 days later, we left for our honeymoon to Vegas, freshly married and full of life. After being in Vegas for 2 days, as we went to eat, things began to turn very ugly. He looked at me across the table and said some of the most crushing words to me that I have ever heard. He cussed me and I left him sitting there as I went to the room and cried myself to sleep. Then, began a life of one bad incidence after another. He had such a critical spirit and condemned most everything in my life and the enemy was trying to plant the doubt in my mind that God had so graciously brought me out of. This man whom I was now married to became an enemy in a sense. A water spot on the sink became me being a slob and way too many things to list in our time frame. He did not like any of my friends but most importantly, he did not like worship. He condemned and put me down because of my faith. He made fun of it and wanted my God to be second to him. I felt that this entire past year had been full of lies and deceit and who does that come from: the enemy, the ultimate liar.
On August 5, 3 months into this marriage, I woke up to my precious kitty Jake trying to hang onto life by a thread. (You see, I have no children and my kitties ARE my children!) Rushing him into the 24 hour vet, he did not make it and I was told he had been kicked by what could have been as forceful as a horse. I knew in my heart what had happened to my baby and received more confirmation as his entire family said they believed he did it without my asking. This is when a certain fear began setting into my life again. I prayed, I cried out to God and I lived with someone who had totally deceived me and my family. I lived with what I consider a dangerous man.
On August 20, I took him to Lueders to a Walk to Emmaus and prayed deeply. As I came to candlelight, I witnessed a glimpse of hope in our lives and in our marriage as I looked into his eyes. He came home and apologized and wanted to start fresh and let go of some habits and behaviors.
This attitude was short-lived as the physical abuse began just 8 days later on August 31. I had a back procedure and that night after drinking too much again, he proceeded to kick me in the back and chase me out of the house as I feared my life. This same man wished people dead!!
Then, I went to my pastor and we sought counseling. We stayed in this counseling and everything sounded good when we were there and turned sour at home every time. There were no fruits being produced in his life.
The second week in December after weekly counseling and lots of talk came the second round of physical abuse as he hit me with a hanger with his daughter in the next room. This is when I told him that he had to leave. I filed for divorce and on March 3, I became divorced again. I felt the shame and the sense of failure again. I am by no means an advocate for divorce; actually I am quite the opposite. I did certainly feel like a failure again but I have learned that FEELINGS will lie but the Word of God is always TRUTH!!
When I was asked to write the Singles Talk on a Chrysalis, I was dead set against it. I have been “relationship-challenged” my entire adult life! I could only tell people what NOT to do apparently. LOL…but God, but God…
I never dreamed that God would use the time in writing the singles talk for an Emmaus Chrysalis as a huge healing experience. Through the writing and seeking and seeking and writing, God showed me some truths that I so desperately needed!! Trust me, when you cry out to Him, He hears and responds! Also, He so lovingly placed people in my life who loved me through this time. You see He places actual people in front of us who are Jesus to us. I would highly recommend letting them love on you in times of need. It is healing. It is encouraging. It is comforting. It is preparation to do the same for someone else a lot of times. Let God love on you, however He chooses. He absolutely loves YOU more than your mind can ever conceive.
We talked and had what I thought was communication. We had a great relationship. I was the apple of his eye and I thought he hung the moon. We liked the same things, went the same places, and enjoyed the same foods. I had prayed that the Lord would bring a Godly man into my life and Matt talked the talk. We attended church together in Lubbock on the weekends we were there and here on the weekends we were here. We prayed for one another. He had been a member of his church since birth basically and I was strong in my own faith.
We planned our wedding that would take place in a friend’s beautiful back yard. There would be numerous family and friends attending and this was all just perfect. The yard was worked up so gorgeous and the florist had specific instruction. The cake decorator was perfect with all her drawings and details about what I wanted. The honeymoon to Vegas was a gift from his parents and both his and my parents were so very excited also.
The day came and turned out so perfect. Everything seemed to just fall into place and we were wed on June 6 of 2009. Then, it will be followed by a tragic surge of events. 2 days later, we left for our honeymoon to Vegas, freshly married and full of life. After being in Vegas for 2 days, as we went to eat, things began to turn very ugly. He looked at me across the table and said some of the most crushing words to me that I have ever heard. He cussed me and I left him sitting there as I went to the room and cried myself to sleep. Then, began a life of one bad incidence after another. He had such a critical spirit and condemned most everything in my life and the enemy was trying to plant the doubt in my mind that God had so graciously brought me out of. This man whom I was now married to became an enemy in a sense. A water spot on the sink became me being a slob and way too many things to list in our time frame. He did not like any of my friends but most importantly, he did not like worship. He condemned and put me down because of my faith. He made fun of it and wanted my God to be second to him. I felt that this entire past year had been full of lies and deceit and who does that come from: the enemy, the ultimate liar.
On August 5, 3 months into this marriage, I woke up to my precious kitty Jake trying to hang onto life by a thread. (You see, I have no children and my kitties ARE my children!) Rushing him into the 24 hour vet, he did not make it and I was told he had been kicked by what could have been as forceful as a horse. I knew in my heart what had happened to my baby and received more confirmation as his entire family said they believed he did it without my asking. This is when a certain fear began setting into my life again. I prayed, I cried out to God and I lived with someone who had totally deceived me and my family. I lived with what I consider a dangerous man.
On August 20, I took him to Lueders to a Walk to Emmaus and prayed deeply. As I came to candlelight, I witnessed a glimpse of hope in our lives and in our marriage as I looked into his eyes. He came home and apologized and wanted to start fresh and let go of some habits and behaviors.
This attitude was short-lived as the physical abuse began just 8 days later on August 31. I had a back procedure and that night after drinking too much again, he proceeded to kick me in the back and chase me out of the house as I feared my life. This same man wished people dead!!
Then, I went to my pastor and we sought counseling. We stayed in this counseling and everything sounded good when we were there and turned sour at home every time. There were no fruits being produced in his life.
The second week in December after weekly counseling and lots of talk came the second round of physical abuse as he hit me with a hanger with his daughter in the next room. This is when I told him that he had to leave. I filed for divorce and on March 3, I became divorced again. I felt the shame and the sense of failure again. I am by no means an advocate for divorce; actually I am quite the opposite. I did certainly feel like a failure again but I have learned that FEELINGS will lie but the Word of God is always TRUTH!!
When I was asked to write the Singles Talk on a Chrysalis, I was dead set against it. I have been “relationship-challenged” my entire adult life! I could only tell people what NOT to do apparently. LOL…but God, but God…
I never dreamed that God would use the time in writing the singles talk for an Emmaus Chrysalis as a huge healing experience. Through the writing and seeking and seeking and writing, God showed me some truths that I so desperately needed!! Trust me, when you cry out to Him, He hears and responds! Also, He so lovingly placed people in my life who loved me through this time. You see He places actual people in front of us who are Jesus to us. I would highly recommend letting them love on you in times of need. It is healing. It is encouraging. It is comforting. It is preparation to do the same for someone else a lot of times. Let God love on you, however He chooses. He absolutely loves YOU more than your mind can ever conceive.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Randomness....
So, in my random mind: I have a question. Am I the only person who LITERALLY thinks of bible verses and the Word to almost everything I hear and everything I say. Even in a negative content, I think about scripture that would rebuke or correct it. I listen to people and think," I'm going to go find that; it's in Ephesians or Galatians or 1 Peter...." I just wonder if I am weird like this or if this is just one of the ways God speaks to me through people.
And, on another note, this morning, I was feeling like staying in bed. I DID NOT want to get up but AGAINST all "feelings"; I got up and it is as if God carried me down the road as I left my podcast behind and just visited with HIM this morning while exercising. Guess what? My attitude is much better. That's one of the many ways He takes care of us, I believe. When we choose in obedience, against our feelings, to walk with God daily and talk with God daily, He will bless that and carry through His promises for us. Believe me, there are days it is absolutely is not on my agenda to get up, yet God says otherwise. It is as if He whispers,"Get outside, I have something for you..." Thank YOU, Father, for always taking care of me.
And, on another note, this morning, I was feeling like staying in bed. I DID NOT want to get up but AGAINST all "feelings"; I got up and it is as if God carried me down the road as I left my podcast behind and just visited with HIM this morning while exercising. Guess what? My attitude is much better. That's one of the many ways He takes care of us, I believe. When we choose in obedience, against our feelings, to walk with God daily and talk with God daily, He will bless that and carry through His promises for us. Believe me, there are days it is absolutely is not on my agenda to get up, yet God says otherwise. It is as if He whispers,"Get outside, I have something for you..." Thank YOU, Father, for always taking care of me.
Monday, January 17, 2011
Finding my Niche, if you will....
Another week has started and I am finding more and more that I LOVE to speak about God and how He really is THE One and Only! When I talk to people about how He has brought me into a life of peace, it makes me so happy. I think I could literally talk for hours and hours about how He loves us enough to carry us through anything and everything....I am rambling....
So, this morning, as I was out in the cold, exercising, God gave me a revelation: why would I settle for something I, (emphasis on I) instead of waiting on what He has in store. I am not quite sure which area in life He means by that and frankly, He will reveal that on His time. Sometimes, I get wrapped up in the thinking "I hope _____ asks me to _____" and then giving that much more thought than I ought to give. This is a distraction from what God ultimately has in store for me. If He is guiding, why would I settle for what I want?
Crazy, isn't it? But, we often do that and turns out mediocre and not exactly what we expected or less than we thought it would be. This is that little rebellious, I want it done now, attitude that I tend to get. Lord, forgive me for attitudes that are not pleasing to you. Lord, take my heart and mold it to be a heart for YOU and help in all ways to acknowledge YOU in my circumstances and in my life. You are my Maker and you hold me in Your Hands. Thank You, Most Gracious Father.
So, this morning, as I was out in the cold, exercising, God gave me a revelation: why would I settle for something I, (emphasis on I) instead of waiting on what He has in store. I am not quite sure which area in life He means by that and frankly, He will reveal that on His time. Sometimes, I get wrapped up in the thinking "I hope _____ asks me to _____" and then giving that much more thought than I ought to give. This is a distraction from what God ultimately has in store for me. If He is guiding, why would I settle for what I want?
Crazy, isn't it? But, we often do that and turns out mediocre and not exactly what we expected or less than we thought it would be. This is that little rebellious, I want it done now, attitude that I tend to get. Lord, forgive me for attitudes that are not pleasing to you. Lord, take my heart and mold it to be a heart for YOU and help in all ways to acknowledge YOU in my circumstances and in my life. You are my Maker and you hold me in Your Hands. Thank You, Most Gracious Father.
Friday, January 7, 2011
Let's fast forward....to 2011
Well, it is now January, 2011!!! What a ride this has been. I guess it's called LIFE. To update you, I am now married to absolutely the most wonderful man a girl could have. Ernie is everything in a husband that I never knew possible. He is a dream come true and it was all in God's Hands!!
We are living north of Merkel in a new home. He pastors the little white church in Elm Valley and those folks are precious to us. Never dreamed that I would be a pastor's wife! God is so funny and He continually brings me out of my comfort zones!!
After the abuse didn't stop with Matt, after he killed my precious kitty, Jake, after abusing me in front of Melanie; I asked him to move out. We sought counseling from our pastor for awhile. I waited for God. I knew He was the only voice I needed to hear and He spoke. It was on a Saturday morning while I was laying in bed. It was just released. That's all but I knew because I was in constant relation with Him. On March 3, one day after my 38th birthday, I went to the courthouse (Mom, in tow) and was divorced. Again. The shame and sense of failure was certainly there. My family did not know what to say so nothing was said. Another time in my life my total reliance HAD to be on God and in God. He is always there - reach and you will find. He consistently tells me, "I am ALL you need" and I believe.
I never dreamed God would begin the healing process so quickly. When working the April walk to Emmaus with many friends, I got to know Ernie better. Something sparked and prayer happened and here we are. Well, there is alot in between but maybe that is whole other day's worth of writing.
For today, this is all. Just know that our God is Healer!!!!!!! Emotional, spiritual, physical, all of it; HE HEALS.
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